Have YOU ever wanted to go to the Black Forest? No, that’s not right…
Have you ever wanted to go to the BLACK FOREST!?
Okay, the question mark and exclamation mark combo makes it seem a bit threatening. Plus are we focusing too much on the Black Forest thing? It’s always been a dream of mine to go there, but some folks around here won’t even have heard of it. Our advertising needs a lot of work before it goes live, basically. I think it’ll be massive once we nail it though. What we’re trying to set up is a European forest retreat…in the middle of Melbourne. Arborists have been helping us with all the specifics, because when I took on this venture I knew almost nothing about trees, and we needed a LOT of tree lopping on our chosen bit of land. No use having a bunch of native Australian trees blighting the landscape when we want people to think that they’re being transported to rural Germany. After that, it’s going to be a matter of clearing out all the roots- again, kinda gonna need the arborists to help me out with that part of the process- and planting a load of fir and pine trees. That’s going to be the main draw that creates the atmosphere, and as weird as it sounds, it’s going to be the easiest thing of all. No, I’m serious. Getting a bunch of trees removed, planting loads more that have been imported from overseas…it all sounds pretty simple compared to the rest of the stuff on my to-do list. At least there are reliable arborist for hire near Melbourne, and they definitely know stuff about trees. But learning how to cook sauerkraut like a native German chef? Finding a bunch of staff who speak fluent German AND can put on a flawless accent? Not really looking forward to that part…
-Hans